(PhatzNewsRoom / The Stir) — Maybe we wish there was one, but there is no giant book that governs the way that we should act in a serious relationship. We’ve all been there: when things go sour and a breakup happens, it feels like your world is crumbling. With time you heal, you move forward, you meet other people. The harsh reality? Getting over an ex isn’t easy. And sometimes, you don’t have to.
I know, I know, getting back together with an ex has all sorts of nasty stipulations. So many questions pop up: If it didn’t work out before, why will this be any different? Why now? The reality? Not all relationships end because one person deliberately hurt the other. Not all relationships end in tears.
Thus I present you with 5 times getting back together with an ex is a good idea. Seriously.
1. The old issues are gone: Certain problems, like anger problems and issues that carry on from youth, aren’t easy to overcome. However, if something like a problem at the office was putting intense pressure on your relationship and that is now a non-issue, this could allow you both to refocus in on the important stuff, AKA the both of you.
2. You’ve forgiven him: Maybe he cheated (horrible). Maybe he moved on too quickly after you broke up (ouch). Maybe he just didn’t give you the kind of attention you deserved because he wasn’t OK with the kind of person he was. If you can find it in your heart to TRULY move on, then you can try again. If not, there’s just no point.
3. You feel a void for their specific companionship: When you’re in an intimate relationship, it’s easy to consider that person your best friend for that period of time. When that person leaves your life, it’s easy to feel something missing. The catch? When you try to fill that spot with someone else and it’s just not the same. There’s a high price to be put on being on the same mental level as someone else.
4. You TRULY could see yourself marrying him: Since the two of you have parted ways, you’ve compared every single man to this one guy. Not just their things like professions or their likes or dislikes — but your potential future involving him. At the end of the day, if you really think this man could be the one, then you owe it to yourself to go for round 2.
5. It’s the best sex you’ve ever had: OK, let me confirm that this is not THE reason to get back with someone. Sexual chemistry is different between every two people. But sometimes you just click the right way with someone, and that’s something you can NOT deny.