(Phatforums News / Match.com) — To all the men out there that enjoy much younger women, listen up: You could be missing something by not selecting a woman closer to your age to date. The benefits of an older woman are that you receive the fruits of wisdom from a woman within your own age range as well as good conversation (you’re on the same page).
If your younger date’s spouting, “Like, oh my God, that’s like totally cool, you know?” Ask yourself: should you run for the hills, or just bask in her girlish qualities? Here are five indicators that she may be too young for you.
1. Her musical taste and yours share little overlap. If you can put up with Christina Aguilera, Britney or the other pop divas she’s into, can she relate to your blues or indie rock faves? If she’s younger than you by a decade or more, it’s a tough call when you are both trying to connect from a cultural and intellectual standpoint. If you’re in the early stages of dating, listen for these cultural clues to determine if she’s out of your orbit. If she’s on another planet, musically, can you live with that?
2. She enjoys “literature lite” while you build up your classics library. If you’d rather be reading Cleopatra: A Life or other intellectual fare, do you mind that Glamour and Cosmopolitan might be her only literary sources? Watch and listen for signs that you are not on the same page in regard to your intellectual priorities. What’s scattered around her place? Is it the Sunday New York Times, BusinessWeek, or just fashion magazines? Ask her what she reads. If you get a blank stare, consider that your answer.
3. She’s younger than your little sister. Many men seek younger women for a variety of reasons when it comes to love (including childbearing duties). But there’s young, and then there’s young. Seven to ten years loosely falls within the same generation. If she’s younger than any of the women you know, let alone your youngest sister, you very well could be robbing the cradle.
4. She’s your “type” from days gone by rather than an accurate reflection of who you are now. Avoid old dating habits (hair color, body type, for example) carried over out of past comfort zones. Have you always favored brunettes? Why? Look in the mirror. What do you want currently out of life? What are your goals? Sometimes it’s easy for us to fall into dating an image of who we were years ago. Date the woman that reflects you now.
5. Your values aren’t necessarily in tune with hers. Take a look at what each of you deems most important for a successful relationship; are these values in harmony with each other? Why do you think she’s dating you, an older man? Often, women find financial and long-term security in dating (and eventually settling down with) an older partner. She gets maturity (hopefully), among the many other benefits of being with an older man. If your values — work ethic and family values are good, for starters — are aligned with hers, chances are, you’ll have a successful match.
Marcia Jedd is a freelance writer based in Minneapolis.
